the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
Someone shattered a urinal.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal