I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
my being single is dangerous.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize