I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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