nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize