We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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