You work out of a Hotel?
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
