Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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