he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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