My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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