You can't special order awesome
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
