Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
