Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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