On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
my poor anus
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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