he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
