i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
