there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
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you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
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I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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