It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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