How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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