Come see our sink grown plant.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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