you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
