I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
