No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
