At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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