whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
