it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
