I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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