So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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