There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
