You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
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