How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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