I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
People in love make me want to vomit
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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