she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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