I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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