Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just gift wrapped bread.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
