i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize