i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We talked him into tasing himself.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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