my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Randomize