Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
