Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
