cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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