You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize