plz talk dirty to me
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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