I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
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He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
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The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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