I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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