Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
