weddingsv make me drug and hornr
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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