i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
