is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
