who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
