I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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