i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Randomize
